When the student is ready, the teacher appears.

Day 2 of my 365 day blog challenge:
That saying couldn't be closer to the truth for me.  This past year 2012 was such a tough year in many ways.  April 11th was my 5th year clear of cancer.  Doctors put so much significance into this 5 year clear.  From the day I was diagnosed I heard "5 year clear" so many times throughout my journey.  As a cancer patient, you put so much thought and strength into making it to that "5 years clear".  For what? So what does it mean? Does it mean if I can just make it to that "5 year clear" everything will be okay? Or does it mean at my "5 year clear" cancer will forever be erased from my mind.  Today, neither could be further from the truth.  For many years I thought both of these at one time or another.  I struggled everyday to get the fear of cancer out of my head.  I would wake up in cold sweats or couldn't sleep for the fear of not waking up.  I struggled wondering whether or not I was going to be here for my amazing son and beautiful partner.   I would look at Nathan and wonder if he would have to grow up without his mommy.

When the student is ready, the teacher appears........
Truth be told, I finally understand that my breast cancer diagnosis would take me 5 years to see it for what it was.....a challenge! A challenge to see what I was truly made of.  How badly did I want to live?  Was I ready for the fight of my life.? Cancer has changed me.  I have embraced the fact that our minds create our lives.  Think positive thoughts and achieve greatness.  Receive all that we desire from life.  Create your life! The way you want it to be.  Think negative thoughts and you create an unhappy life.  You have poor health, sadness, financial problems.  I have lived and struggled with both thoughts.  I feel so blessed that the teacher appeared and I was ready.  Living in a healthy state of mind is so much more peaceful and fulfilling.

Until tomorrow..........................

Giving thanks.